Coup d'état
by When Snow Melts Away
Summary: Cartman's conspiring to take over school presidency. Somehow his plans involve Kenny, but he must not know it. Kenny X Wendy
1. Chapter 1

**Hi there! This is my first South Park fanfiction and also my first try at a romantic story with an actual plot. Oh and, if someone would be interested in beta-reading this story, that'd be really great - I'm open to all comments and suggestions, by the way. Thank you for reading ^^. **

* * *

**Prologue – Mysterion's quest**

A cold gust of late-winter wind clashed the shutters of his bedroom window with a loud thud as he crawled in and jumped to the floor, swiftly turning to pull the panel shut before the noise woke anyone. His hands were stiff and red, his nose and ears frozen: he was happy to finally be protected from the wind. His body relaxed as it slowly adjusted to the temperature – not that it was very much warmer inside: Kenny's parents could barely afford heating.

A quick glance to the alarm clock informed him that he only had a few more hours of sleep before he'd have to get up for school. With quick and silent movements, he took off his Mysterion outfit, neatly folding it before tossing it inside the secret faux-bottom compartment of his upper-left drawer. His back and arms hurt and he felt a stinging sensation where multiple shallow cuts crossed his knuckles. Man, he'd had a rough night. Maybe he really should have ditched the superhero act when all the others did.

Kenny sat on his bed and stretched, trying to shake the hurt off his back and arm muscles. As he lay down, heavy with exhaustion, the pain grew numb and easier to forget. It was a familiar sensation. Ever since he started playing Mysterion, he had spent countless nights roaming the city looking for crime and a chance to stop it. He was moderately successful in doing so. Over the years he'd been involved in numerous cases and helped the police catch quite a few bad guys. It was very tiring – a lot more than it was rewarding – and he was not sure why he kept doing it.

For a while when he was a kid, the people of South Park looked up to Mysterion and called him a hero and at that moment Kenny believed that he had purpose. To him, the superhero act was a lot more than a game – it was an attempt to make sense of his life, of his power; an identity quest of sorts that, in the end, only managed to send him back to square one. Still, even after he'd lost all hope to find out anything about himself and his ability to cheat death, he had never been able to give up on Mysterion. Was it because the persona was now such a big part of him that he could not let it go, or because he still felt purpose fighting crime? Was it because he felt that, as Mysterion, his actions had more impact than when he was Kenny? Was it a kind of twisted escape from reality? He may never find out.

**Chapter 1 – In which Cartman exploits Kenny's weakness**

Kenny managed to show up to the right class a few seconds before the bell rang. Relieved that he'd made it on time, he sat down and greeted Kyle, who sat on his left, with a wide toothy smile that always seemed to make his friend slightly uncomfortable. It was barely perceptible but there was always the faintest hesitation on his face before he smiled back, a minute shrivel of disdain twisting his nose. It was not that Kyle disliked Kenny; in fact, they were great friends and hung out together most of the time, but there was something about the strength and authenticity of Kenny's smile that he found near unbearable. It was too loud, too selfless, too free and weirdest of all, it forced you to smile back, almost against your will.

The History teacher began his lesson and Kyle's attention focused on the day's subject. Kenny opened his book and glanced around the class as the other students shuffled about to find the right page. In the front row, Butters tapped his foot silently, his eyes glued to the blackboard as the teacher unfolded the world map to locate the action of the events they were going to learn about. Behind him, Cartman sat lazily, rolling pieces of paper into small balls between his short, fat fingers. He lined them beside his book and every so often threw one at Butters' head, never missing his oblivious target. Clyde and Craig sat in the back, looking uninterested. Normally Bebe sat next to Clyde, but today she seemed to have chosen the farthest seat from him, which indicated that they were currently off. Kenny guessed that by the end of the week they would be on again, though it would certainly cost Clyde a new pair of shoes. For the moment however, Bebe sat next to Wendy, stooped over her iPhone, probably scrolling through her Facebook feed. The contrast between her posture and Wendy's was striking: Stan's ex-girlfriend sat very straight, her long black hair cascading down her back. She listened to the teacher with attention and wrote down neatly organized notes in a black leather-bound notebook.

Kenny had not realised that he was staring at her when, as if she'd sensed it, she slowly turned her head back and met his eyes, holding his gaze for a moment. This sudden acknowledgement of his existence made him uncomfortable and he glanced down at his opened textbook, letting the hood of his sweatshirt fall lower on his face. When he dared a quick look in her direction again, she had resumed her previous attitude, deeply absorbed in the lesson.

He shuffled through his backpack to retrieve worn out loose-leaf sheets, wrote the date on top and started taking notes, too. They probably were not as exhaustive or as neat as Wendy's, but they were adorned with cool little dinosaur drawings, which was definitely a big plus.

After class Kenny and Kyle joined Stan in front of his locker. They made plans to meet at Kyle's house after school to play videogames and the conversation quickly drifted on to other mundane subjects. The 15 minutes break between periods came to an end rapidly: Stan and Kyle waved their friend goodbye as they disappeared in the hallway while Kenny grabbed a plastic bag containing a crumpled sports outfit from his locker. His next class was PE.

He pondered skipping class for a moment. His arms still hurt from last night and he was already so exhausted, he would probably end up snoring through the last period – again! Plus he barely had anything to eat this morning and his stomach growled, protesting to be filled. On the other hand he would get to ogle the girls' bare legs and round, perky bottoms for 45 minutes. No surprise – the latter argument won. He was about to enter the changing room when Cartman's voice called him out from the nearby bathroom.

''Kinny! Kinny! Come in here! I've got something to tell you.''

Kenny shrugged and went in the changing room. The fat jerk probably had something stupid to tell him anyway. Something made-up and overdramatic that he would make a fuss about just to get his hands on whatever it was he wanted. Heavy footsteps followed him – Eric would not let him go.

''Listen McCormick, seriously. I've got confidential information! The whole school's well-being is at stake. There is an important mission to be fulfilled and you're my man! Hear me out.''

''Whatever, Cartman, it probably isn't important – if it is even real at all. Get lost.''

''Duuuude, I'm telling you, it's so seriously, it's a matter of life or death!''

Kenny chuckled. ''And why exactly would that matter to me?''

His sarcasm was lost on Cartman, who kept following him.

''Because! Don't you want to stop being so poor? Don't you think your life is shitty enough, Kinny, so shitty that you can't even ask a girl out because you're afraid you won't have any cash to take her on a date? Eh! Who's gonna want to date someone so poor, that he can't even pay attention! But we can make a deal. I need you to do something for me, real important. I'm even gonna pay for your trouble. Can't say I ain't fair.''

Insults aside, Cartman's suggestion smelled fishy. It would have been even subtler if he'd worn a sign that said ''It's a trap'' over his head. His plans always lead to disaster and it was crystal clear to Kenny that agreeing to help Cartman would only get him into trouble. But you could always count on the fat ass to try and exploit your weaknesses against you. Kenny really did need money and yes, he would risk getting involved in Cartman's crazy schemes to earn it. He turned to face Eric.

''Well I'm all ears. What do you need me for?''

* * *

Running shoes squeaked on the gym floor as the students hopped and ran about the basketball court, tossing the ball back and forth. Kenny sat on the bench waiting for his turn to replace another player, completely dumbfounded. His confusion was such that he even forgot to watch Bebe's ample breasts bounce underneath her white T-shirt as she jumped, tall, pretty and energetic.

Cartman had asked him to volunteer at the school's library. Simple as that. Twice a week, on Tuesdays and Thursdays, starting today. Kenny would earn $20 for each time he went. The only condition was that he would tell no one that Cartman had asked him to do it. There surely was a catch, but what? Cartman refused to disclose any more information about his ''mission'', arguing that if Kenny was ''aware of his purpose'' he would ''ruin the authenticity of his act'', whatever that meant. In what way would Kenny's volunteering benefit Cartman enough to motivate him to invest money in it? There was no apparent explanation – nothing that made sense.

''McCormick! For God's sake, McCormick! Are you deaf?'' The gym teacher barked, pulling him from his thoughts. ''Come on, get up, it's your turn!'' he added, gesticulating toward the court.

The teenager stood up mechanically and slowly jogged to join his team on the court. Concentrating on passing the ball would at least take his mind off Cartman's case for a while. The game resumed. Almost immediately, Token threw the ball at him. ''Right here, McCormick'' shouted Clyde from behind him. Kenny dribbled a bit, waiting for Token to run past the other team's defense. ''Let's roll!'' he thought, and passed the ball.

* * *

Students were rushing past Stan to exit the classroom, hurrying to get home. Without haste he put his books back into his bag and walked over to Kenny. The other boy, asleep on his desk, had not heard the teacher dismiss class. Stan woke him up by pulling his hood down, causing him to jump with surprise.

''Dude, you fell asleep again!''

Kenny groaned, replacing his hood on top of his head. ''Class is over?''

''As you can see. What the hell, Kenny, do you really watch porn all night?''

''Well'' he grinned playfully ''I am a 16-years old teenager with raging hormones. What can I say?''

''You're incredible.''

''That's what your mom said last night!''

''Dude, that joke's so old'' Stan laughed as they both grabbed their bags to leave the classroom. ''Seriously, though, Kenny, you fall asleep every day in the last period. You could at least try not to snore!''

They walked to their lockers where Kyle waited for them, his bag packed, coat on and green ushanka completely covering his red curls. As soon as he saw them, he started babbling about the game they had agreed to play later on.

''You guys! I thought about a great strategy to defeat the other team. It won't be easy but with a bit of practice I think it's possible! Our best chance to succeed is to use each player's assets in a way that it'll benefit our team. Ken, you're the fastest shooter, so…''

''Ah…about that, Kyle. I won't be able to come today.'' The boys looked at him with surprise.

''Why?'' they asked at the same time. ''You agreed to come, this morning'' recalled Stan.

''Yeah, I know, but something got in the way.''

He'd forgotten to think about what he would tell the guys. It had to be something believable as he would never miss an occasion to spend time with his best friends, not to mention raid Mrs. Broflovski's fridge, without a very good reason. He racked his brain for a plausible excuse.

''I've been given detention.''

''Dude, you're so lame'' said Stan. ''What did you do this time?''

''Nothing much, I was late for PE. The teacher said I've been late too often and gave me detention.'' It was a lie but not so much, since he had indeed been late for PE and his teacher did complain about it – although all of it was Cartman's fault. His friends rolled their eyes – this was commonplace for Kenny. They would try Kyle's new strategy some other time. Stan put his hat on, zipped his coat and both of them left after exchanging a few jokes about how their friend would never change.

There remained only a few other students in the hallway; most of them had left already. Outside, the dirty late-winter snow reflected a feeble, declining sun. It was cold and Kenny could see the students pulling their hats lower and hiding their hands in their pockets as they hurried home.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2 – In which Kenny gets to stare at Wendy's butt**

He could hardly remember the last time he had been in the school library. It was a well-lit and wide room, crowded with high metallic bookshelves, with several tables and workstations equipped with computers wedged in between. Several students sat in a corner with laptops and a pile of books, visibly working on a school project. Mrs. Barnes, the librarian, stood behind the counter, scanning returned books. She was old, small and bony and she looked fragile, almost breakable. But as Kenny approached the counter this impression vanished: her frail arms moved with confidence as she repeated the same, monotonous motion.

''Hello Mrs. Barnes'' he said with the warmest smile. Kenny often had the impression that he did not really control his smile, like it sometimes conveyed emotions that he did not voluntarily want to convey: this was such an occurrence. He had meant something small and polite but it ended up heartfelt and friendly.

Mrs. Barnes looked up to him, smiling back. ''Well hello, young man. How may I help you?''

Her face was lightly wrinkled, with high cheekbones and big, intelligent eyes. Kenny looked down, avoiding the old woman's gaze as he spoke.

''I heard that volunteers were needed and I came to offer my help, but I'm not really sure, well… how that's done or what I should do….''

If his statement surprised the old librarian, she did not let it show.

''How nice of you, Kenneth! It's been a long time since I saw you last, have you grown taller still?''

Kenny was a bit embarrassed that she remembered him. ''I guess – I'm not really sure. But you know what they say about weed – it just keeps growing!''

Mrs. Barnes laughed lightly. ''I certainly hope you don't think of yourself as a weed, Kenneth. Your height will be helpful though. Do you know why I asked for a little bit of help? A few months ago I fell off the step trying to reach the higher shelf and broke my ankle. Unfortunately the only volunteer who showed up is not very much taller than I am! Wendy will certainly appreciate your help. You can join her over there, she'll show you what to do!'' she said, gesturing toward an area in the back of the library.

Startled at the mention of Wendy's name, Kenny did not hear the last part of her sentence and mumbled a vague thank you before starting in the indicated direction. Of course the volunteer was Wendy – who else would do such a thing? What in heavens would he tell her? She was sure to question his motivation for helping out: his presence here was too unusual not to draw attention.

His steps grew silent as he approached her. She stood next to a big table on which dozens of books were piled, sorting them out. His throat felt dry. He had no idea what to tell her. Unconsciously he wiped his clammy palms on the front of his jeans.

''Hey.'' Wendy straightened her back at the sound of his voice, visibly surprised.

''Hey Kenny'' she said as she recognized him, ''what are you doing here?''.

'' Well '' he grinned, hoping his smile would get the attention away from his words ''I came to volunteer, I mean, I heard Mrs. Barnes needed a little help.''

The girl looked far from convinced. She twisted her eyebrows in a comical way, as if he'd just told her that Craig had gone an entire day without flipping anyone or that Bebe had given away her entire shoe collection to charity.

''Weren't you supposed to go over at Kyle's? I overhead you guys planning to meet th-'' she stopped abruptly ''Oh no'' comprehension, then dread, spread upon her expression. ''Don't tell me Stan sent you here to try to convince me to get back together with him?''

''Wha- ? Stan? No!'' he sputtered, before realizing that he'd just screwed his most believable excuse.

Her face relaxed. ''Well, if that's not the case, may I ask again why you're here?''

Kenny's mind raced. What could he say that would convince her or at least prevent her to keep questioning him?

''Ok, you got me. Since you're now single and all, I am here to woo you, Miss Testaburger! I totally got a crush on your sexy back! I came so I could get a good look! '' he said jokingly, winking at her.

''Oh God, I hope you don't really expect to score a date with techniques like that.'' She laughed. ''I think I kinda lack boobs to be your kind of girl anyway.''

''That's not true, I like boobs whatever their size, they're still magical.''

She laughed again. ''You know, that might be the most honest thing you said today. Anyway, come here, I'll show you what to do.''

After that she dropped the subject of his mysterious presence entirely. She showed him how to check the returned books for damage and sort them into piles depending on their Dewey code numbers. He learned that all books were categorized in ten classes of subject, again divided in ten divisions, and again in ten sub-divisions. Wendy told him about the different classes and the numbers they were assigned to and they proceeded to sort out the books. Kenny liked that she was so passionate and meticulous about everything she did and tried his best to remember all of her explanations.

Once all the books had been sorted, they transferred them onto a trolley. Wendy led him toward the Social Sciences section; he followed her, wheeling the trolley, his eyes glued to her backside. In his humble opinion, this girl had the nicest, roundest, cutest little butt in the whole school. He relished in the moment, suddenly feeling very lucky that he got to spend time with her. A comfortable silence installed itself between the two of them as they placed the books back in the shelves, following the correct order.

As they moved on to another section, Kenny realized that he was actually enjoying himself: he felt relaxed, at peace. Maybe it was the soothing atmosphere of the library but he found that he would not mind doing this at all. Even better, he was going to get paid to do it – he still had to find out why, but in the meantime, he felt he should just enjoy it.

''Hey Wendy, what's your favourite kind of books?''

She seemed to think about her answer, mouth half open.

''Well, that depends on my mood. Usually what I'm looking for in a book is the opportunity to learn new things or to keep myself updated on a certain subject. I mostly read about social and environmental issues, politics and the like. But sometimes I really just want to escape and then I'll get myself a really good fiction novel. What about you, Kenny? ''

''I don't read all that much – there was this book I really liked, though, The Gambler, it's called.''

''I know that title from somewhere'' replied Wendy ''but I'm not really sure. What is it about?''

Their quiet conversation went on until they were all done. Kenny told her about how fascinated he had been with the poignant humanity of his favourite book and how impressed he had been when he learned that the author had not written, but dictated the whole story in less than a month. Wendy admitted that the book that had impacted her most, emotionally, was Gone with the Wind. '' In spite of its historical inaccuracy and sometimes blatant racism, it's an amazing book. I wept for like two days straight, couldn't put it down. It's weird, how Scarlett is a bitch and a gold-digger, but also one of the strongest and most dependable characters. In the end, you find that she only did the best she could – like we all do. It's because she's so stubborn that she survives and it's this same stubbornness that also prevents her from knowing the love of her life. It's really sad.''

Before they left, Wendy insisted on trying to find his favourite book so she could rent it, but he couldn't remember the author's name. They had to check it up in the library's computerized catalogue. Unfortunately, their search yielded no result. The book wasn't available. ''Our school's so lame'' commented Wendy on their way out. They both waved Mrs. Barnes goodbye and she thanked them for their help.

As they went out of school they hesitated a bit. They would be going in different directions now: Wendy would take the west side of the road to the prettiest, almost suburban neighbourhood of South Park, and he would walk east past the train tracks to the poorest side of town.

''Well'' she started ''it's been fun having company for once! Will you also join me on Thursday?''

He nodded, embarrassed. Why was he suddenly so nervous?

''Allright then, Kenny, see you tomorrow!'' she smiled as started in the direction of her home.

* * *

As he patrolled the streets of South Park that night, clad in his Mysterion outfit, the teenager couldn't stop thinking about his ''mission'' and Cartman's possible motivation for making him volunteer at the library. So far he was completely clueless. How did Eric even know that volunteers were needed in the first place? That was not the kind of thing he usually would pay attention to. Also, why didn't he just ask Wendy to do whatever it was that he wanted done? She was already volunteering, out of her own free will, so he wouldn't even have to pay her. Although she wasn't exactly on friendly terms with Cartman, she would probably accept to help him, either out of kindness or pride. Unless it went against her principles…which, admittedly, was probably the case.

So, what did Cartman want that she wouldn't let him have? The plausible answers to that question were so numerous that it just confused him even more. And then the idea hit him, that Eric might be trying to use him to spy on Wendy! Appalled by his hypothesis, Kenny ran home to inspect his clothes and other belongings in case Cartman had hidden tiny microphones on him. There was nothing he would put past Eric's evil genius - that jerk stopped at nothing to achieve his stupid goals.

Thoroughly he inspected each and every garment, but there was nothing to be found. Both relieved and puzzled, Kenny jumped out of his bedroom window. It was high time for Mysterion to face The Coon again!


	3. Chapter 3

**Hi there! So I'm posting the 3rd chapter but I've got two more already written and I must say this story turned out very different from what I intended when I first started. I've been trying to keep in mind that South Park is a comedy, but I'm not the best at writing funny stuff so we'll see how it goes! I find it's a lot of fun that whatever happens can just be blamed either on Eric Cartman or on South Park being weird, no questions asked! Anyway, thank you for ****reading!**

**Chapter 3 – In which Cartman's evil plan is unveiled**

Forcing Cartman's window open proved harder than he expected. The idiot kept it locked – what a paranoid. It was nothing that Mysterion couldn't work around, though. With swift and silent movements, he jumped into Cartman's bedroom, leaving the window open for later – he would use to exit suddenly for dramatic effect. Silencing his steps he walked to the bed, where the fatass lay loudly snoring. Without hesitation, he grabbed the sleeper's neck, steadily choking him.

Cartman woke up in panic. He tried to scream but his attacker prevented him from doing so by pushing a pillow into his face, so he retaliated by trashing about wildly in hope to free himself. His attacker proved stronger though, and held him firmly in place. Using his lower, smoky Mysterion voice, Kenny ordered ''Relax, you fat jerk, don't move, don't scream and you won't be harmed.'' Reluctantly his victim grew still and he carefully took the pillow off his face.

Cartman's eyes widened with surprise as he recognized him. Then he started chuckling. If Kenny hadn't been choking him, he would have been laughing his ass off.

''What?'' barked Mysterion ''Quit laughing or I'll choke you harder.''

''Dude…can't…'' coughed his victim's feeble voice ''too…fucking…hilarious…''.

Upset by this sudden turn of event, Mysterion let go of Cartman's throat. The other boy proceeded to roar with laughter, rocking from side to side and holding his belly, as if Mysterion's presence in his bedroom at night was a comedy act.

Kenny waited patiently for his hilarity to subside.

''Dude, I can't believe you're still hooked on that thing. Ohmygod I can't breathe, ahahahaha! Best fucking joke ever! ''

''Yeah? Well this ''joke'' could turn into your worst nightmare.'' He threatened. ''I figured out that you were trying to use Kenny McCormick to spy on Wendy Testaburger – I'll beat the shit out of you for even thinking about pulling that cheap trick.'' Mysterion grabbed his victim by the shoulder, fist raised to punch him right in the face when Cartman's puzzled look made him doubt the conclusion he had jumped to.

''Spy on Wendy? Why the hell would I wanna spy on that bitch? – and even if I wanted to, I'd never hire you to do it. What the fuck – you're not well, McCormick.''

''I'm Mysterion.''

''You're Kenny McCormick.''

''Mysterion!''

''For fuck's sake, Kinny!''

Kenny released his grip.

''Why, then? Why did you ask Kenny to volunteer at the library? I don't get it – there's nothing there that could even remotely be of any interest to you. It's got to be about Testaburger.''

Cartman sighed. ''Kinny, Kinny, Kinny….I couldn't care less about that girl – she's a huge bitch, but I'm not trying to hurt her or anything.''

''What's it about, then?''

''I can't tell you – I would, but if you knew, Kinny, you'd ruin it!''

''If you're gonna be like that, Kenny McCormick will quit. He doesn't want to be part of your sick plans – especially if Wendy's involved in any way.''

Cartman laughed again. ''Knight in shining armor, already? Well holy shit, seems like that sick fuck Craig was right after all.'' He paused. ''Look, Kinny, I know that I am not the most trustworthy person, but I promise that your volunteering at the library won't hurt anyone or put anyone in danger. Everything is going to be fine for you and Wendy and everyone else. Okay? Now leave my fucking house! ''

''I don't trust you one bit, Cartman, but I don't have any proof against you, so I'll let you be. But hear me out – if I notice something weird going on, I'm gonna beat your ass so hard, you won't remember your own name. Got it?''

Before Cartman could reply anything, Mysterion has disappeared out of the window.

* * *

''Do the classes really bore him that much or do you think he might be sick or something? It's not normal to sleep all the time like that.'' said Kyle to Stan as he poked Kenny's shoulder. Their friend was slumped on his desk, fast asleep. It was only 11:30.

''Who knows?'' answered Stan, as he tried to shake his friend awake. ''Common, dude, wake up. It's lunch time!''

Kenny groaned sleepily, eyes half-open: ''Is class over already?''

''Yeah'', replied Kyle, ''you slept through it all. You should see a doctor, dude, you've got issues.''

Kenny stretched lazily. ''Yeah, yeah, mom. Shit – I could eat a whole elephant – is it lunchtime yet?''

The three friends joked as they walked to the cafeteria, failing to notice Cartman and Craig standing suspiciously close at the end of the hallway, whispering between them.

''Turns out that you were right, asshole.'' Cartman told Craig about Mysterion's visit. ''He was all like: oh Cartman, are you spying on Wendy, because I won't allow it! and all like: if you hurt her, I'll beat your ass! Fucking hilarious. How did you even notice?''

'' I just knew '' explained Craig laconically.

''Are you sure about her, too?''

Craig nodded.

''I don't see why that bitch would go for him'' Eric continued ''but who cares? Soon her reign will be over and I will take over to rid us of the new healthy menu she's forced onto us! ''

Cartman was boiling with excitement. ''See Tucker, a woman's biggest weakness is love. Even Testaburger is not immune to that sort of shit.''

''Her relationship with Stan never prevented her from getting shit done '', observed Craig.

''Of course it didn't! Stan's always with Kyle, she had too much free time, plus Stan's so fucking boring! Kenny's a loser, but if he'd try, he'd know how to show a girl a good time.''

''Your plan's still stupid. Anyway - it doesn't have anything to do with me.''

Cartman was so into his monologue that he didn't hear Craig's intervention.

''Oh yeah! He will blow her mind away and she will be so taken with him, that she'll neglect her duties as school president. Her iron fist will finally soften! And that's when I'll overthrow her dictatorship! I will fight for the return of hamburgers, fries and pizza in the cafeteria menu and all the kids shall take part in my coup d'état! Aahahahahahahah! What do you say, Craig, am I a genius or what? Craig? '' He turned to where the other boy should have been only to find out that Craig was gone. ''I'm really going to kill that asshole'' he thought.

Stan was complaining about how life at home had become insufferable since his father had discovered yet another new hobby, when Wendy showed up to their table, causing him to shut up mid-sentence. His reaction to their most recent break-up, about two months ago, had been surprisingly mild, as though he'd finally resigned to the fact that they were never going to work out. Maybe for that reason, he was unusually uncomfortable around her.

''Hi guys!'' she waved them hello.

''Hello Wendy'' replied Kyle for the three of them: Kenny was too busy wolfing down his sandwich to bother and Stan was too embarrassed to utter a single word.

''I won't bother you long – I was just wondering if by any chance one of you had seen my agenda? I seem to have lost it.''

''Sorry - I haven't noticed anything'' answered Kyle while his two friends shook their heads, ''what color is it, though, I'll keep an eye open.''

''It's pink, about this size. Thank you, Kyle, that's very sweet of you.''

She quickly walked away and disappeared into the crowd of students. ''Dude, has Wendy ever called you sweet before?'' asked Stan.

''Uh? I can't recall. She might have, she might haven't. Why does it matter?''

''Maybe she's trying to hit on you?''

''What the hell, Stan? Why would she do that?''

''I don't know… I always wondered why she was dating me, when she could have dated you instead – you're a much better match… You're both smart and dedicated; you come from normal, grounded families that insist of the importance of tradition and the like. You would probably be able to understand her better than I ever could.''

Kyle rolled his eyes. ''Having a lot in common with someone does not mean you will love this person or that your relationship with that person will work easily. Besides, take a look at me, Stan: I'm a nerd. High school girls don't like nerds.''

''You know Wendy, dude, she's the kind of girl who can see past appearance. And she's kind of a nerd herself, no?''

Kenny was squeezing the last drops out of his juice box as he listened to the conversation going on between his friends. It seemed that Stan's self-esteem was on the low.

''No,'' replied Kyle with confidence, ''it's not the same for Wendy because she's also one of the prettiest girls in school. No one's a cheerleader AND a nerd. She's just a smart cheerleader.''

''She could still be interested in you.''

''She's not. Besides, I'm not interested in her, anyway.''

''She called you sweet!''

''That doesn't mean anything, she was just being nice!''

''Guys'' interrupted Kenny ''this whole conversation is pathetic.''

Stan sighed. ''Yeah, you're right, dude… I'm sorry…it's just that, this time around I feel like this was our final breakup. She won't ever come back to me and I kinda dread the moment when I'll see her with someone else.''

''Dude, you just need to forget her! How about we go play hockey tonight? That'll take our minds off them girls for a while, nah?

''Our minds maybe'' answered Kyle jokingly ''but yours Ken? Does it ever happen?''

They laughed, effectively dissipating the tension.


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4 - In which Kenny treats himself at Cartman's expense**

As the days went by, Kenny found that he was actually looking forward to his volunteering time with Wendy. Some days they didn't talk much, content just to appreciate the library's quiet as well as each other's presence. Other times he tried to get her started on a subject, and she'd go on and on and he would listen to her well-constructed arguments, watching her get riled up as she spoke. He loved how her cheeks would redden with emotion and how she used fluid, confident motions to support her declarations. He loved how her supple breasts jiggled as she moved and how her ass looked amazing in everything that she wore.

He jacked off to thoughts of her all the time, now. In his fantasies, she always played the clichéd role of the slutty nerd: slutty secretary, slutty librarian, slutty schoolgirl in uniform. Wendy Testaburger, poster girl for all strong, independant women, hardcore protester for gender equality, protector of the marginalised and all-around overachiever, flushed with desire, willing and submissive; the thought was too hot to resist. He imagined her disheveled, in various states of undress, pink with embarrassment, asking him to do things to her, things that she was ashamed to ask and he made her beg and beg, relishing the sight of her.

The truth was, Wendy had always been Kenny's ultimate fantasy, for the very reason that she was so strong,intelligent and capable. But since she had been in a relationship with one of his best friends for so long, he had always pushed those thoughts to the back of his head. Now that she was single and that he got to know her better, all those thoughts came back rushing with devastating force. Still, she was inaccessible. A girl like Wendy would never go for a guy like him. Cartman might be an idiot and a jerk, but he was right about this: no girl would want to date that weird McCormick kid, whose white thrash parents were poor drunkards who fed their children pop tarts.

So he was determined to enjoy what he could get. Those hours alone with her in the library, he savoured them, thinking she'd never let him any closer.

* * *

One Saturday morning Cartman woke him up far too early and instructed him to go down on Main Street and stay there until further notice. Kenny refused at first - he had only gone to bed four hours ago and all he wished for was to sleep until the afternoon, but Cartman barked that it was all part of his mission and insisted that since Kenny was getting paid for this shit, he could be considered an employee of his and should learn to respect his authority. Naturally, Kenny told him to fuck off and hung up.

Of course, being the piece of shit that he is, Cartman just called back and kept calling. Even though Kenny did not pick up, Eric's unabashed persistency built so much frustration inside of him that suddenly he didn't feel like sleeping anymore. So he picked up the phone and demanded a raise. A violent argument ensued, with insults flying low on both ends of the line. Eventually they reached a compromise: Kenny's wage would not be raised but his expenses for the event would be covered upon presentation of valid receipts. He had every intention of taking full advantage of that arrangement, planning to treat himself to a huge breakfast and maybe one or two expensive coffee-dessert-things from Harbucks.

So that explained how Kenny found himself doubled-over on a street bench on Main at 9 o'clock on a Saturday, holding his full, aching stomach with both arms, certain he was going to die. He couldn't remember if he ever died from too much food before, so maybe today was going to be the day. He was going to implode right here on Main Street, and the half-digested content of his stomach and intestines was going to spill all over the pro-choice manifestants who were currently marching down the road with held up signs and colored t-shirts worn over winter gear, chanting clever slogans in unison. Or he would start vomiting all over and that wouldn't be much better. Oh God. Luckily Cartman had not yet instructed him to do anything: he would have been utterly unable to do more than fall off the bench and roll down on the sidewalk.

He understood now why gluttony was considered a sin. If he died now, he would most likely end up in Hell and for a moment he wondered if that would be better or worse than being alive and having to endure this terrible pain.

''Kenny?''

A far-away voice stirred him from his thoughts.

''Kenny, are you okay?''

He looked up at the source of the voice. His vision was a bit hazy and it took him a moment to focus on Wendy's face. She looked worried and he instantly felt ashamed that she found him here, crouched on a bench feeling sick. He tried his best to straighten himself up and smile at her.

''Hey Wendy.''

''Are you okay?'' she asked again. ''It looked like you were in pain.''

''Uh. Yeah… You see'' he paused, trying to figure out what to tell her ''I won a bet last night - and I figured since I'd never went to a breakfast restaurant I'd try one. It was amazing. I think I ordered everything. I had one waffle with fruits and whipped cream, one egg benedict with two hashbrown potatoes and a side of bacon, three breakfast sausages, a regular toast with raspberry jam and the day's special smoothie. Now I'm kind of wallowing in regret and self-pity - my tummy huuuurts.''

Wendy burst out laughing with a kind of earnest, unrestrained hilarity that contaminated him straight away. The next thing he knew she was sitting beside him, holding her sides, tears beading at the corner of her eyes. ''Oh my god' she said between pants ''you're too much! And now my belly hurts too!''

They both finally calmed down, their breathing still a bit erratic.

''Shit - now my belly hurts from too much food AND from laughing'', Kenny complained jokingly. ''What were you doing here so early anyway?''

''Oh, I am here with the other manifestants. This is a really important issue for women, you know.''

''Yeah.''

A comfortable silence befell them as they watched the manifestants brandish their signs, shouting, clapping their hands and making all kinds of noise.

''Hey Wendy.''

''Yeah?''

''Truth or dare?''

''Um?'' hesitated, surprised with his sudden game suggestion.

''It's a rhetorical question really - you can't choose truth otherwise the game's boring, so you've got to choose dare.''

''Ok then, dare.''

He grinned.

''I dare you to ditch the manifestation.''

''What? No - I told you it's an important issue, I've got to make my voice heard!''

''Come on!''

''No.''

''Come on - I'll treat you to coffee or hot chocolate.''

''No.''

''It's a dare, Wendy, you can't say no, it's against the rules!''

''That dare wasn't fair.''

''Look - someday not so far away we'll become adults and we'll have to deal with even more crap than we have to deal with now. Responsibilities will pile up and we're gonna become trapped in a world where everything is an important issue. Today's Saturday, it's sunny, I just had the best breakfast of my life and I'm just thinking - let's make today really fun!''

''Yeah, as tempting as that sounds, Kenny, I'm still going to have to say no. I don't think I could be having fun while knowing I could be here trying to make things change for the better.''

''Ok then, I'm just going to have to kidnap you.''

Before she realised what was happening, she had been thrown on a sturdy shoulder like a vulgar potato bag as Kenny attempted his kidnapping. He held onto her fast, managing to reach the corner of the street before she succeeded in freeing herself with a well-aimed knee kick to the groin. She jumped off him as he doubled-over in pain. ''Fuck! Wendy, were you trying to castrate me? I know you're pro-choice but male sterilization is NOT the answer, geez!''

And she was laughing again, her face still red from having been upside down, long black hair all messy. For a moment she ceased looking so unattainable, and he wanted to see more of this Wendy, this simple and unpretentious side of her. Straightening himself up, he threatened :''You're gonna pay for that, Testaburger.''

''Uh-oh! But you gotta catch me first!'' she challenged him as she started running.

She was fast but he was much taller and his nightly Mysterion routine kept him in shape : he quickly caught up to her and tackled her into the snow near the children's park. She was panting and laughing and struggling for air as he mercilessly tickled her. His hood had fallen down on his back, revealing messy blonde hair and a grin so wide he almost looked Canadian.

* * *

Cartman was taking a piss when Butters' enthusiastic shout reached his ear.

''Oh! Hey, Eric! He's on top of her now!''

Cartman rushed to Butter's side, snatching the binoculars from the smaller boy's hands.

''Motherfucker! He's actually pulling it off!''

''Do you think he'll kiss her? It would be so sweet - just like in a movie!''

''Shut up, Butters! I did not bring you with me to hear your sappy comments about Kenny's love life. We're on a mission to take over the school presidency, dammit!''

The little blond did not quite grasp how spying on Kenny was related with taking over the school presidency but decided not to question Eric's schemes - they were always chaotic and overcomplicated. He wasn't sure how or why he always found himself pulled along with them, either.

''NO! Fucking piece of shit - No! What a fucking idiot….I'm seriously, dude!''

''What's the matter, Eric?''

''That asshole didn't kiss her! What's he thinking? I did NOT go the trouble to arrange this coincidental meeting with Wendy to witness that retard ruin everything by NOT kissing her when he had the chance!''

''Well maybe he's nervous, Eric, don't be so hard on Kenny.''

''Hey wait, what's going on now? Where's he taking her? Butters, we've got to follow them.''

Butters scrambled to gather their things as Cartman hurried him to leave; they were coming in their direction! Sweating with stress, both of them rushed toward the street, frantically looking for another hiding spot. Cartman pulled him in a narrow and sombre alley between two stores and they kneeled behind trash cans. After a short wait, they saw Kenny and Wendy cross the street in direction of Harbucks. They were both smiling and talking as Kenny held the door for her to get inside.

''Fuck - that's going to cost me like 15$ for their stupid coffees! He could have just taken her to Tweek Bros and spent just the half of that - but NO, this idiot had to go and take her to fucking Harbucks.''

The pair came out of the coffee shop after an agonizing 10 minutes in which Butters feared to pass out from the disgusting stench that came from the trash cans he and Cartman stood behind. He felt relieved when Eric pulled him out of the alley to follow them, giving him instructions and a couple of stealth tips as they went.

''Isn't that stalking, though, Eric? I don't want to stalk on my own friends. That would be wrong, I guess.''

''It's not stalking, Butters you idiot, it's called SPYING and it's totally cool 'cause we're doing it for the greater good, understand?''

Sneaking on the couple without being noticed was easy until they reached Stark's Pond. In town, there were plenty of spots to hide in, shortcuts to take and alternative passageways to creep into. But now in the open, it would get a lot more complicated, especially since there were only a few kids playing in the park near the pond. Less people meant greater chance to be spotted. Cartman decided to leave more distance between them and the pair they were spying on.

When Kenny and Wendy entered the forest, Butters regretted tagging along. He was a bit scared of going there, it was a well-knowned fact that wolves inhabited it and surely other terrifying creatures lurked in the shadows of the great pines and fir trees. Plus, Cartman forbade him to walk on the main tracks since the footprints they left in the snow could alert the pair to their presence. They had to walk off-piste, in between the trees, where rocks and roots and tree branches blocked their way, adding to the difficulty of their hike.

Butters was exhausted when Cartman made him stop and crouch on the ground, requesting the binoculars. Kenny and Wendy had reached a small clearing but they were too far away to see what was going on.

''I can't fucking believe it. Why is that idiot taking her to see Rudolph the motherfucking reindeer? I ain't paying him for that shit!''

* * *

That day, Kenny walked back home grinning like an idiot. Luckily his hood and scarf hid most of his face otherwise he might have scared someone. Happiness filled him better than this morning's breakfast, and for the first time in very long, he felt whole and light. He was in love and he felt like he was a little sun, projecting love all around the way the sun project lights, and everything that surrounded him appeared lovely and warm and wonderful because bathed in the rays of his sunny love. He was in love and he wasn't scared, at that moment and after that day, he couldn't be scared because he felt invincible - and in a way, wasn't he?

He'd taken Wendy to that clearing in the forest near Stark's Pond, where deers often came to rest. He knew this because he often wandered the trails, trying to get away from his home when it turned into a battlefield. A fawn was born recently and he knew they were likely to find it there if they were careful. He had been lucky: mother and baby were cuddled in the snow, the fawn nipping at his mother's pointy ear. Slowly, as silently as possible, they had approached them until they were just a couple of meters away.

Wendy was fascinated. She had never been able to come this close to a wild deer before - and the fawn was so cute! She reached for Kenny's hand, wanting to share her excitement but not daring to speak in fear of scaring the animals. He had squeezed her hand into his and she had looked at him, big starry brown eyes and all, and he had felt blessed. He'd made her happy. And in turn, he realised, she made him feel like the happiest, luckiest man on Earth. How lucky had he been to meet her on Main Street that morning!

And then it occurred to him that he had completely forgotten about Cartman's mission! Shit!


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5 - In which Bebe reveals herself a Kendy fangirl**

Kenny had been home playing Chinpokomon on his old gameboy for a while when his battered Nokia rang : it was Cartman. In the middle of a gym battle, too: that fat jerk had the worst timing.

He picked up the call with a small pang of guilt over his forgotten mission. Cartman would surely be upset that he wasn't where he was instructed to stay - not that he really minded upsetting Cartman, but he was getting paid for those so-called missions and he felt a little bad about taking the money while not really doing anything in return.

''Hey fatass''

''I'm not fat, I'm just big boned, shithead!''. Classic reply.

''Yeah, yeah - Look, if you're calling about the mission, I'm sorry.''

''Yeah, you better be, you useless piece of shit. I thought you'd get it on faster than that! It's costing me a fortune, dude, you're totally breaking my balls.''

''Get what on?''

''Either those rumors about you are all made-up or Craig's a lying dick.''

''What does Craig have to do with it? And what the hell are you talking about?''

''Look Kinny - Kyle always says you're smarter than you let on. Well right now, you're proving him wrong. Now that I think about it, it's not very surprising but for the purpose of my fight, grow a brain, will ya?''

Kenny was going to reply something about his dick being so huge that when it got hard there wasn't enough blood left in his body to irrigate his brain when Cartman started whining again.

''And you could have gone at Tweek Bros - Harbucks, seriously? Do you want to ruin me?''

''Well yeah, anything to piss you off!'' he replied with a laugh.

''You're such a huge dick, McCormick.''

''No, I have a huge dick, there's a nuance.'' replied he, glad he could recuperate his joke somehow.

''Fuck you!'' Cartman screamed before abruptly hanging up.

''Well that was weird.''

He sat on his bed with his paused game in his hands, trying to process what had just happened. As made abundantly clear since the beginning, Cartman was working toward a goal, one that he refused to disclose. Kenny was given no instructions on what his role was or what to do. He was simply asked to be in different places at a given time. From what he could gather, Craig was somehow involved in the scheme, probably as an informant of some kind, since Cartman had mentioned him twice in relation with something Craig had said.

Also, Cartman knew that he bought coffees at Harbucks so he knew that Kenny he had met Wendy at the manifestation and that he treated her, but he made no comments about that, except to complain that it would cost him a lot. It was unusual, because the fatass despised Wendy and would definitely complain about wasting money on her. Which meant that, as Kenny suspected before, Cartman's plans had something to do with her. To know what exactly, he would have to ask Craig - or possibly find a way to blackmail him. Well, Mysterion could take care of that. In the meantime, there were more badges to be won in his quest to become Royal Crown Chinpoko Master.

* * *

That Saturday evening, Wendy felt so happy and reinvigorated that she did all of her homework in record time. Every task had appeared easier than usual and as soon as 7 o'clock she was all done, which left her clueless as to what to do with her free time. She decided to give Bebe a call and see what the other girl was up to.

''Hi Bebe!''

''Hello sweetie! - hey, you're calling early. Aren't you supposed to be doing your homework?''

''I'm finished already.''

''Really? Wow, you're fast. That essay we have to write for History is going to take me the whole weekend I think.''

''As if you'd spend the whole weekend doing homework.'' commented Wendy sarcastically with a roll of her eyes.

''Okay, the whole night before we've got to hand it. Still. It looks long and painful.''

''You make it sound worse than it actually is.''

''Yeah well, you make it sound easier than it actually is.''

They laughed.

''So what's up with Clyde? Has he been replying to your texts?''

''Yeah, I'm supposed to meet him for coffee tomorrow so we can talk about what happened. But I don't know - don't get me wrong, I love Clyde to bits, but I'm not sure if he's really the one for me. I mean, it's been like, half a dozen times we've taken a break? Maybe that means we're just never gonna work out.''

''Really, Bebe? That's what you said last month.''

Wendy was quite certain that Bebe did not love Clyde anymore the way that she did when they first started to go out. But they had grown so close in the meantime, so comfortable with one another, that their relationship reminded her of an old pair of shoes: a bit worn out, but soft and perfectly fitted. Clyde was a habit that Bebe tried to get rid of but fell back on again and again. It was a bit sad, because Clyde was crazy about her and got his heart broken every time Bebe doubted their relationship.

''Anyway - we'll see how it goes tomorrow. How was that manifestation of yours this morning?''

''Oh. I kind of… missed it.'' Suddenly she felt a pang of guilt nag at her : she hadn't given a single thought to the manifestation since leaving with Kenny.

''You missed it? Was it not today?''

''It was and I did go but by chance I met Kenny on Main, and he - I'm not so sure how he pulled it off - but he convinced to leave the manifestation to go take a walk in the woods near Stark's Pond.''

''Wait - you, Wendy Testaburger, ditched a manifestation to take a walk with Kenny McCormick?'' Bebe sounded doubtful.

''Uh...yes. He took me to see a baby deer with its mom! The fawn was so adorable, we've been able to come quite close to it too! I did feel guilty to leave the manifestation but I really had fun today.''

''You've been spending an awful lot of time with Kenny lately, though. Now that I think about it, you mentioned him quite often in the last few weeks. Is there something going on between the two of you that I - your ultimate BFF - don't know about?''

''What? Nooooo! No! Nothing of the sort. It's just that I got to know him better since he started volunteering at the library.'' explained Wendy.

''He does?'' Perplexity was apparent in Bebe's voice.

''Yes - although he never told me why he did it. Whenever I asked, he brushed it off as a joke about trying to seduce me.''

''Maybe you thought he was joking but he wasn't!''

''I'm pretty sure he wasn't serious. He hasn't tried to flirt with me or anything. He treats me like a friend, nothing more and nothing less.'' replied Wendy.

But Bebe was already enthralled with her theory and nothing her friend said afterwards about only being friends with the boy could alter her mind. She quickly became overly excited with the idea of Kenny courting Wendy - supposedly it was ''exactly like'' something out of those crappy romance novels Bebe liked to read: bad boy Kenny overcoming his upbringing and revealing himself a good man at heart as he struggled to change to win the heart of his belle, and Wendy finding her dull, boring, uptight world rocked upside down by his mere suave presence. By the time her friend was done spurting romantic nonsense about her hypothetical future love life, Wendy had been cringing so much she could feel the beginning of a headache creeping its way up her forehead. She lightly massaged the bridge of her nose, a habit she had unconsciously picked up from Stan.

''Oh my god, Bebe, will you just stop it! You make absolutely no sense whatsoever. Kenny isn't even a bad boy to begin with - do you even know him at all?''

''Not really, no, but Clyde says...''

''Look - let's drop the subject. There's nothing between me and Kenny, allright? Hey - wanna sleep over? Let's do our nails and watch a movie.''

''Cool! Let me just grab my pajamas and I'll be on my way! Then you can tell me all about how your future boyfriend's such a good guy.''

''BEBE''

''I know you love me!''

* * *

When Kyle called to invite him over to play videogames together with Stan and Ike, Kenny quickly forgot his plans to force a confession out of Craig that night and ran all the way to the Broflovski's, thinking he could always wait until the next day to learn about what Cartman was up to. But as luck would have it, he got hit by a car while returning home on Sunday morning and ended up hanging out with Damien in Hell instead of doing his homework and playing superhero. When he finally woke up in his bed, it was Monday morning and he had to hurry up otherwise he would be late for school.

He arrived last at the bus stop. Kyle greeted him with a smile and a fist bump and asked how the rest of his weekend had been. As Kenny made up stories about playing a vintage Chinpokomon game and flipping through some porn magazines, he noticed that Cartman stood very close to Stan and spoke to him in a low voice, which was very unusual. Normally the fatass spoke loud and confidently, not giving two shits about who heard him or what they heard.

''What's up with Cartman?'' he asked Kyle.

''Oh don't get me started, he's been acting suspicious for days, and now I bet he's trying to get Stan involved. I tried to interrupt their conversation, but Stan told me to leave him be, so I guess I'll have to talk some sense into him later.''

''Wonder what the idiot is up to.'' he mumbled, pensive.

''To no good, that's for sure.''

The whole morning Cartman followed Stan everywhere like their shoelaces were tied together. In class he sat beside him and Kenny noticed they were passing a piece of paper back and forth between the two of them just like Bebe and Red did when one of them was brokenhearted. What could his friends be talking about? Did it have to do with the so-called missions he'd been asked to perform? He wanted to corner Stan alone but that seemed unlikely with Cartman glued to his every step. And why was Stan's face so pale? Worried, Kenny resolved to eavesdrop on them.

Once class was over, he rushed toward the boy's bathroom and hid into one of the stalls. Cartman always took a piss after first period so it was very likely that he and Stan would show up. With a little luck, he would get to hear a fragment of their conversation. He sat down on the toilet seat while he waited, pants around the ankles to make his presence unsuspicious. His mission as his nighttime persona had taught him the importance of such details.

As he had predicted, Cartman and Stan entered the bathroom a few moments later.

''I'm telling you, Stan, I believe you ought to give it a chance. You were in love with her your whole life. It's like your future with her is written in the stars. The chance to have a childhood romance turn into a lifelong relationship is not given to everyone, and I say - you gotta fight for something like that.''

''Yeah Cartman, maybe you're right. But Wendy's the kind of person who knows what she want in life and last time she said she felt we didn't belong together anymore. She said we both needed to move on and find happiness on our own. I really felt that she wouldn't come back, ever.''

''Wendy's a chick, dude, and chicks don't know shit. Their feelings are constantly changing and illogical - they might be feeling one way one minute, and the next she'll be telling you otherwise. But you know better, Stan, you know that chick needs you - she just wants you to prove to her how much you care.''

A part of Kenny raged at hearing Cartman insult Wendy (not to mention women in general) like that, but another, insecure, hesitant side of him, feared that maybe there was a chance that it was true, and that she would return to Stan if he gave it a shot. For a moment he felt his heart strain in his chest, compressed with old feelings of invisibility, irrelevance, inadequacy. Wendy would never pick him, the weird McCormick kid, over someone like Stan. Hell - she would never even think about being with him that way, he knew it for a fact. But it was hard to fight and ignore the feelings he harboured for her.

''Now is not the time to dwell on your pitiful situation, though!'' he thought. The part of him that brought Mysterion to life called his attention back to his friend's conversation. Although Stan kept arguing back to Cartman that there was no way Wendy was still in love with him, it was apparent that he was nearly convinced of the contrary. Cartman had succeeded in kindling a speck of hope in his heart and with a little more effort, would set it afire. At least that's how Kenny viewed it, still sitting on the toilet seat as his friends left the bathroom. He didn't know what to think of what he had heard. He felt confused - first with the force of his feelings for Wendy, then with Stan's attitude and finally with Cartman's involvement in the whole thing. Was this a part of his conspiracy? What was it, that he wanted to achieve by trying to reconcile Stan and Wendy? The only consistent element in all of Cartman's actions lately was that they all indirectly involved Wendy, and this time more than ever, he was determined to learn why.


End file.
